Last weekend i wanted to go to the mountains to do some hiking. I long for the nature a lot. However, the weather was terrible the whole weekend covered with fog so i stayed in my parent's house and did some cooking. It was strange to think of the fact that a bit more then a month ago i walked in fog, heavy rain and wind. It didnt matter on the camino what weather it is, i just had to go and only because i felt like going in spite of the bad weather or my sorrows. But i am now back to the real life and if my ego, my rational part says i should stay i usually stay.
Nowadays i hardly went out to have a nice walk at the riverside as i used to. Due to the weather getting worse people have less mood to go out walking, rather just wishes to have a tea or wine with friends. There was always something like that, i hardly had time for myself, not even to have some relaxing jogging. When i am finally alone then i take a book (psychology related of course :), everything is related to that if is about people, at least for me).
Anyways, it appears that i dont wanna stay with myself. It might be that i am afraid of the things that could come up from my unconscious. But that is part of me, and sooner or later that will come up for sure.
While chatting some emotion came up generating some tears in my eyes. So, there might be something more.
It is better if the inner things come up bit by bit then if there is a big explosure when the pressure inside is too high due to supression used by us. So everyone should rather spend some time with him/herself and let out the pressure before it would be too late.
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